A Fig For The Beadle

Paul Cromford

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This was a concept for an EP way back in 2010 ... and it's taken me this long to actually work towards completing it!

Scroll down the page for the lyrics.

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LYRICS

TIT FOR TAT

Genghis Khan, I don’t like what you said about my wife 
I’m disaffected and annoyed 
‘Got my rebel hordes deployed 
Your every yurt will be destroyed 
And I’ll give you the pasting of your life. 

Crazy Horse, you should have given Custer just a shave 
Now you’re gonna get what for 
I’ve got cavalry guns galore 
Your birthright won’t exist no more 
I’ll dispossess your nation 
To teach you your obligation to behave. 

If you’re playing the victim card 
Nobody judges you too hard 
Just take it easy on that higher ground 
Funny how the land slides in our favour 
Now that you do us down… 

Star and Crescent, you’ve been locking horns since God knows when 
Never mind who started it 
Nobody cares, just wish you’d quit 
Your endless tit for tat for tit 
If you were Stan and Ollie 
We’d be laughing at the folly of grown men. 

We just want you all to quit 
Your tat for tit for tat for tit 
For tat for tit for tat for tit for tat for tit for tat for tit 
For tat for tit for tat for tit for tat for tit for tat for tit 

Fortatfortitfortatfortitfortatfortitfortatfortitfortatfortitfortatfortit 
fortatfortitfortatfortitfor…..

 

FOUR CORNERS

You trim your candle, turn down your lamp 
And your embers glow 
You search their flicker for faint reminders 
Of those you know 
I wait for you, and when you turn in I’ll be there too 
With you enfolded in me, the regular saints won’t do 

Messrs Matthew and Mark 
Will be left in the dark 
Messrs Luke and John 
Won’t know what’s going on 

There may be people who work tonight 
Or who sleep in peace 
There may be people who weep, or sicken, 
Or crave release 
From all four corners beyond your room I know they call 
But with you enfolded in me, I’d let every man jack fall 

Messrs Matthew and Mark 
Will be left in the dark 
Messrs Luke and John 
Won’t know what’s going on 

Messrs Matthew and Mark 
Will be left in the dark 
Messrs Luke and John 
Won’t know what’s going on 

Messrs Matthew and Mark 
Leave us be in the dark 
Messrs Luke and John 
It’s high time you were gone

 

A CARPENTER I'D NEVER BE

I was barely weaned when my dad said to me 
“I’m going to train you, young man; 
You’ll learn all that’s good of the shaping of wood 
‘Cause a carpenter, a carpenter, that’s what I am. 

So said my father but time after time 
Mother said “I disagree: 
He’s gentle and fey, his hands pale as whey 
I fear a carpenter, a carpenter he’ll never be.” 

I was bound apprentice at 13 years old 
Followed my dad like a lamb 
As he seasoned and sawed and he planed and be bored 
And said “A carpenter, a carpenter, that’s what I am”. 

A breadboard I made for my ma’s cousin Liz 
And used up a whole cedar tree 
Mama booked bereft at the chippings that I’d left 
And said “A carpenter, a carpenter he’ll never be”. 

Late every evening you’d find me engrossed 
Bathing the holes in my hands; 
I’d bandage them tight, and my prayer for the night 
Was “A carpenter, a carpenter, that’s what I am”. 

I’d made good the roof for the girl of my dreams, 
It fell down spectacularly; 
That girl was heard to sneer as they carried her clear 
“A carpenter, a carpenter he’ll never be”. 

But I made no change 
Till the voices in my head said: 
“Anointed is something to be....”

 

NO SKIN OFF MY NOSE

 Let the tough nuts in my stream 
Do me down for living in my dream, it’s all the same to me 
Let the gymslip mothers’ clique 
Satirise my other-worldly streak, it’s all the same to me 

‘Cause nothing can hit me where I live 
You’ll hear no hoot that I could give 
It’s no skin off my nose 
Always I’m staring into space, always finding a better place 
It’s no skin off my nose 

My flippancies galore 
May captivate or irritate or bore, it’s all the same to me 
While the breadth of my estate 
Provokes them all to jibe or deprecate, it’s all the same to me 

‘Cause nothing can hit me where I live 
You’ll hear no hoot that I could give 
It’s no skin off my nose 
Always I’m staring into space, always finding a better place 
It’s no skin off my nose 

It’s no skin off my nose 
It’s no skin off my nose 

Let the businesses that hire 
Kid themselves I share their zealous fire, it’s all the same to me 
Let the registrars collate 
The papers that reduce us all to dates, it’s all the same to me 

‘Cause nothing can hit me where I live 
You’ll hear no hoot that I could give 
It’s no skin off my nose 
Always I’m staring into space, always finding a better place 
It’s no skin off my nose 

It’s no skin off my nose 
It’s no skin off my nose